Dear Alan,

I am so sorry for your loss. Words get caught up in my throat — it’s small consolation, but you are not alone. Nothing will make sense for a while, this whole world won’t make sense. Help each other, but know that you will grieve differently than your wife. Luckily (is that a correct word?), there’s no wrong way to grieve.

I wish you both strength. I hope you can find a support group for neonatal loss, our hospital offered one at the time. And, again, please accept my condolences.

Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.

Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.