Dear Jon,

That party sounds awful — you describe it fantastically, though. Good times were NOT had by all.

When I used to work, I remember sitting through some godawful parties. Not in restaurants or pubs, but in the actual office. That is not the way to have fun. I also remember everyone being sober. So on one hand, no one is more obnoxious than any other day. On the other hand, I was sober!

My husband’s boss does it brilliantly. Every year he invites all the Vice Presidents of the Mental Health Center of Denver (& their partners) to his house for dinner. Jeff is the VP of Human Reaources — brag. And then he serves us amazing food that his husband & he made that day, with groceries bought that day. Carl Clark is a psychiatrist, & his husband is a pediatrician, & their two passions are traveling & cooking. They make different dishes. Every day. I think they either blogged about it or put their dinners up on YouTube. In any case, it’s incredibly delicious. The only problem (& this is first world problem) was that they had “good” wine. I drink Moscato. They had good beer. Too hoppy for me — I enjoy a smooth, malty brew. I wound up drinking water. The horror!

Last year, when we were leaving, I slipped & fell on my ass three steps away from the front door. And not like sliding gracefully with a little “whomp,” no, there was much flailing of arms, mincing little steps trying to catch myself & the half sow cow twisted forward flop heard around the neighborhood. Carl was mortified, & I was clicked over. Luckily, I didn’t land on my face & only my ego was seriously bruised. And my right hip, and the right elbow, which absorbed most of the impact. But mostly my ego. I was mortified, & way too sober, but I led the way to a good laugh. ‘Cause the food was worth it!

Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.

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