Dear Juliann,

It’s funny, I never thought I’d get married, have children… yet here I am, 54 years old, married for more than 25 years & two kids later.

I got married because I could not imagine my life where I would not have my best friend & partner next to me every night & every morning. I love him, but I also really, really like him. And even after all these years, when he walks into a room, it’s somehow easier for me to breath.

I suppose I didn’t HAVE to marry him, we could have simply lived together, I didn’t care, but he did. So did my parents. So did his. If it made him happy, it wasn’t a big deal for me. But I tell you what — we’re not going to “renew” our vows. We did it right the first time. I don’t know if you can tell, I am not a romantic in the family, he is. And when I married him, I didn’t want to change him, I liked him just fine the way he was & was just looking forward to growing together. We trust each other & we talk about everything. EVERYTHING!

I hope this helps. People get married for all sorts of reasons that make sense to them at the time, & yet only about half of the marriages make it. Maybe we expect to be rescued, but from what I observed, if you’re waiting for your knight in shining armor to come galloping in on his stallion to swoop you up, you are going to wind up spending a great deal of time cleaning up after that stallion.

Written by

Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.

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