Dear Juliann,

It’s funny, I never thought I’d get married, have children… yet here I am, 54 years old, married for more than 25 years & two kids later.

I got married because I could not imagine my life where I would not have my best friend & partner next to me every night & every morning. I love him, but I also really, really like him. And even after all these years, when he walks into a room, it’s somehow easier for me to breath.

I suppose I didn’t HAVE to marry him, we could have simply lived together, I didn’t care, but he did. So did my parents. So did his. If it made him happy, it wasn’t a big deal for me. But I tell you what — we’re not going to “renew” our vows. We did it right the first time. I don’t know if you can tell, I am not a romantic in the family, he is. And when I married him, I didn’t want to change him, I liked him just fine the way he was & was just looking forward to growing together. We trust each other & we talk about everything. EVERYTHING!

I hope this helps. People get married for all sorts of reasons that make sense to them at the time, & yet only about half of the marriages make it. Maybe we expect to be rescued, but from what I observed, if you’re waiting for your knight in shining armor to come galloping in on his stallion to swoop you up, you are going to wind up spending a great deal of time cleaning up after that stallion.

Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.

Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.