I liked your article Richie — it takes guts to write of your fears, it takes guts to move out of your comfort zone & across the country.
You say you have a safety net, you could always come back. Sure, but does that take away from the fact that you are still risking all? Is an acrobat less of an acrobat doing all he can just because he knows he won’t die if he falls? Does he train less, risk less, try less hard?
Failure is always an option in life. Breathing guarantees nothing except that one day you’ll stop doing that, & that day may be tomorrow or next week. (Nope, I’m not an optimist, why do you ask?) What isn’t an option is not going for it. Never apologize for having someone love you enough to take you back.
Keep writing. You’re not as alone as you think, we’re rooting for you! Having a support system in place isn’t a weakness, it’s a sign of good mental health! Good luck!