Jon, I completely miss the part of your morning ritual. You know, the one everyone is talking about, the brushing of teeth with your non-dominant hand, meditating, journaling….

I’m just shitting with ya! I stopped paying attention to those people selling me on morning rituals after the third guru on them emphasized how important getting up at 4 or 5 am was & how my shower should be cold to get rid of inflammation. I do not get up before people in prison do, & there is something called “Tylenol” for inflammation.

New Year, same us. I don’t like to facilitate change until late March, early April. At least you can become an expert on computers. Computers, pftt! It’s just a passing phase. I’ll hitch my horse to the wagon & ride into town for supplies, get some more candles for readin’ & such. Churning butter keeps me warm!

Holidays with the family are just… what’s the word? Painful. After I moved out, my parents bought a dishwasher. Repainted the house, on the inside. Changed my tiny study into my dad’s tiny computer room — where he plays Solitaire on his computer — & changed the locks. That last one hurt my little feelings. I moved to Jackson Hole, Wyoming, sure, 10 hours away, but the day I returned they went away to a party, leaving me locked out. I don’t think they missed me. I think they love my sibling better, & I’m the only child! Oy!

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Writer and storyteller, immigrant, wife, mom, knitter, collector of jokes, lover of cheap, sweet wine.

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