Justifiable paranoia?

Sometimes I like to think like a criminal, so I do not wind up being a victim.

I like to park my car for easy get-aways, always backing into the space or driving through to the other side of double parking space, so that when I leave, I’m driving forward — not backing out first. It requires a little more planning, and, at times, more patience. Sometimes I have to walk more from my car to events or places, but my mind is more at ease knowing that my exit will be swifter and easier. If anyone asks me why I like to do that, I jokingly explain that in my previous life, I used to be a get-away driver for bank robbers.

In restaurants, I like to sit with my back to the wall, facing windows. I call it paranoia. What exactly do I accomplish by doing this? I’m not armed, and if I see someone who is, all I am really capable of doing is screaming and peeing my pants. But simply having the ability to be aware of my surroundings gives me enough peace of mind to enjoy my food more than when I sit with my back to the window or the only entrance/exit to the place. The only other person I’ve known who also did this — almost insisted upon it — was a retired police officer — but in his case, he always carried a small gun in his pocket … and no, he was not happy to see you.

In the 1990s, there was a TV show called Homicide: Life on the Streets. Two of the characters, cops…