Story 100 of 100
The Excellent Adventure of Spaceman, Johnny Black
He pivoted sharply left, as he fired the laser canons to the right. The spaceship’s hull groaned in protest, but held strong.
“Holy Bjork, that was close! I love you, Baby,” he growled to his old, creaky spaceship — biting on the unlit cigar in his mouth.
“I love you too, Johnny,” replied the ship. Somehow, a long, long time ago, in a galaxy next door, the wires had got crossed on the voice module and Baby’s soothing female voice now sounded like Jackie Mason.
“One of the dustworms is still on your tail,” warned Baby. “Should I deploy the escape shuttle?”
“I’ve only got one shuttle left. I hate to lose it,” Johnny said, furiously working the cigar to the other side of his mouth.
“Then throw a wormhole generator. There’s your perfect get-away plan,” Baby suggested.
“All right, but I also have got one of those left, too. … Here goes nothing,” Johnny pulled down a lever, and pushed a button on the console. Somewhere from below came a sound like a door refusing to open.
“Sorry, Johnny, one of the worms dented me. Let me fix that. … Oooh, that tickled,” Baby said, and a wormhole opened up to the right of them. The last pursuing dustworm turned towards the…