The Hawaiian Job.
Brian sat at the hotel bar, overlooking the resort swimming pool, the beach, and the ocean beyond. He took another swig from his third sweet and strong Mai Tai.
“Don’t move,” he heard the soft whisper behind his right ear. He froze.
Slap! The sting of the palm on his neck rang out.
“That was a very large mosquito. Hold on, I’ll wipe it off,” said a woman, who was now speaking in a normal voice. He dared not move until she wiped something, presumably the afore-mentioned mosquito, off his neck. Then, he swiveled in his chair, looking over to faced his rescuer/attacker.
She was large, in every sense, tall and fat, her mass of short, blond curls bounced under a bright pink kerchief, but her smile also had large dimples and she looked happy. Her blue eyes crinkled with merriment as she thrust her right hand at him, “Brandi, with an ‘i,’” she said.
“Brian, also with an ‘i,’” he answered, as she pumped his hand enthusiastically. She laughed — a low giggle, as if it was the cleverest thing she’d ever heard.
“I am ever so glad I saved your life, or at least the quality of your life. You never know what diseases those suckers carry,” Brandi said.
“Well, thank you so much for saving me. Is that an Australian accent I hear?” Brian asked.
“Close, but no cigar. I’m a Kiwi — that’s a New Zealander for you, Yanks,” she answered.
“Good to know, Brandi from New Zealand. Only you don’t get a cigar either, I’m Canadian,” Brian corrected her and finished his drink.
Brandi laughed again and said, “Oh no! Sorry, mate. Let me buy you another drink to make up for the insult.” Before he could speak, she motioned the bartender over and said, “One more Mai Tai for my friend Brian with an i.”
The drink arrived and while he sipped, she added, “My mistake, Brian. I really can’t hear your accent at all. My husband says I am completely tone deaf,” it sounded like she said “tone diff.” “He’s not wrong.”
She just seemed so lively, sitting in the Hawaiian hotel bar. She seemed like a person who had fun no matter where they were. Brandi looked out into the street and clapped her hands.